Is This You? What Words Are Worth

Do not be alarmed. This is not going to be a combo spelling and math test. No, it’s throwing around words that, out of the blue, my friends and I will stop and say, “Now that right there is a three-dollar word for sure.” You know, when in conversation, a word comes up with more than, say, three syllables. Like atrocious. There, now that’s one worth at least $3.15.

We humans seem only to be happiest when we put a value on things in our lives. But. Yes, a gold-plated valuable “but.” What if we didn’t? Chaos would surely erupt. Attaching value is no less important than lining up all my M&Ms by color. Putting the ones I like the best first and going down from there. At the end of the line, I put the least liked colored ones. I, of course, then eat the ones I like the least and save the best-colored ones to gobble up last. In my head, I am saving the best for last. With all the grandeur they deserve. OOH! Grandeur- worth about $2.75. Is there a different flavor with the colors? No, of course not. Well, except in my mind. Like words. There aren’t any that are more important than others. They are just words, right? It’s the placement that gives words value.

We can say no, nope, nada, or even noper-doper all the do-dah day. That last way of saying “no” is worth at least a quarter. There are people, for example, Hemingway, who loved to write in what is called plain writing. I have looked at his style a few times. He, as I see it, would write, “No.”  But I, on the other hand, am more of a “Noper-doper all the do-dah day” writer. Both are negative, but one is factual, and one has flare. Of course, I will never be close to what Hemingway could fit onto a page. I take pleasure in the fact that we both had and have that “love to write” gene. I see the biggest difference this way. If what I read is true about him, Hemingway would stew and sweat and drink until every word in “The Sun Also Rises” was perfectly stationed in their respective spots on the page. Me? I put my fingers out, and the words just seem to fall out of my fingertips and onto the page. I don’t know where they come from, but at the end of each story, I take the time to thank God for bestowing His gift on me. Hey, bestowing, another couple of bucks at least.

I remember the hardest word I had to learn to spell in grade school. It was: character. Holy Moses. I missed it like three weeks in a row. The teacher would not take it off my ten-word list of words to learn until I got it right. HAHA. Believe it or not, just now, when I went to write character in this story—I misspelled it. I did, however, correctly spell misspelled. I have enough characters in me that character should become characteristically easy for me to spell. Man! Characteristically. $4.77. Cha-ching.

There are also little important eye-popping words. Love. Hate. Life. Death.  Invaluable opposites. Of course, a tiny word can make things hugely opposite, too. Oh, that word “not” can cause quite a stir. Like, pregnant and not pregnant. So even though the word “not” is only three little letters, you can see that it could be almost priceless. YIKERS.

Mark Twain is often quoted as saying, “Don’t use a five-dollar word when a fifty-cent word will do.” In reading some Twain I noticed he too liked to slip in some words bigger than needed to be. We, as humans, always want to be thought of as intelligent. It’s human nature to puff up occasionally when the opportunity arises. I like to think, though, in my case, I am full of twenty-five-cent words with a few fifty-centers thrown in for good measure. In one of my tag lines, I will sometimes write:

“Be Happy, Happy All The Time”

Clear, concise, and succinct. Oh my, there are three words that could be at least $3.55 combined. In being a wordsmith, one could write that same sentiment this way:  

“Strive To At All Times Show That You Desire To Be Delightfully Glad To Show You Are Favorably Ecstatic All Hours Of Each Twenty-four Time Periods Of Your Existence.”

            Whichever you are, a $5.00 or a fifty-cent conveyor of your experiences, stay true to your words, thoughts, and deeds. Oh and by the way, the words noted in this story are worth $15.17 if you were keeping track. 

Trina lives in Diamond Valley, north of Eureka, Nevada. She loves to hear from readers. Email her at [email protected].

Really!