I would hazard a guess that we all have been grocery shopping. Alone or with kids or a spouse. Grocery shopping is one of those things that can be the best fun. Or the one thing that you dread. Personally, nine out of ten times I go grocery shopping, it is fun. Oh, especially in winter. In winter, I can buy ice cream and frozen goodies that are all bad for me and make it all the way home before they thaw. Every so often, though, we find it’s time to buy everything that’s big, bulky, and, ugh, heavy. Then, cue the death march music. Then you get a real workout grocery shopping.
I’m not talking about the once or twice-a-year trip to Costco or Sam’s Club. But seriously, those are always heavy trips. Surely you’ve watched the guy that passes you going in the opposite direction with the flatbed orange carts layered with—oh my goodness—everything from cases of water to cases of toilet paper and paper products, 100% beef patties, lettuce and dish soap and canned nacho cheese to go with the ten-pound bag of tortilla chips. Hanging from the handle may be some batteries. Balanced on the tip-top, there may be a new printer, a set of dishes, and a huge pie from the bakery. Yes, that’s the heavy trip that, thankfully, I only have once a year. Oh, my aching back.
But! Yes, a tired, heavy “but.” What about the trips we take to the grocery store for more than bread milk, and cheese? I have one of those coming up. I’ve put it off for the last couple of months, but things are getting dire. T-paper is spinning on its next to the last roll. Laundry detergent and dish soap are being combined to stretch them both out for as long as they can create a bubble. Oh. I nearly had to use a real plate that needs to be washed because my supply of paper plates is down to the tiny ones that are usually used to serve a cookie or two when someone stops for tea. That’s just one scoot down the “utility” aisle.
If you haven’t heard this before, let me enlighten you. The shopper first takes things off the grocery shelf, puts them in the basket, and rolls the basket all over the store. Picking up and thus growing the number of items in the cart. Then, going up to check out, we again pick up each item and place each and every one of them on the magic belt so someone can add it all up. Unless you use the self-checkout. Just as a side note: when I go and do this big heavy shopping, I will stand in a line just so I don’t have to check myself out!
After hunting and gathering, I corralled everything on a huge list, from big blocks of cheese to cans of everything from soup to applesauce, tuna, and veggies. If luck is on your side, you’ll actually get someone to bag the goodies for you and pile them back in the cart. Yes, bread and tomatoes are on the bottom. Then we push that cart to our vehicle (uphill through the snow) and unload it all. Oofah.
After getting over the sticker shock of the prices of groceries and deciding that new underwear will just have to wait yet another month. We get to go home and unload the groceries into the house. Whew? Not done yet. Nope. Next comes putting it all away. That’s always a jigsaw because, since the last time you bought that box of crackers, they have changed the size of the box. That’s just one item. Now you think we are done, don’t you? Nope.
Next comes taking something out of the pantry, cupboard, and refrigerator, cooking it, and serving it to your loving family. Oh, how domestic of the chief cook and bottle washer. Now we are done, right? Nope. As a final task, at least in my house, I then take out the trash. Haha.
If you were counting, we get to handle every item a minimum of seven times. So yes, yes, that’s the grocery shopping trip that lays before me sometime this month.
I have occasionally longed to be the person I sometimes see shopping who has a can of nuts, a small bag of oranges, some bacon, and a can of soup in their cart. Who gets to do that? Someone who lives down the street from the grocery store, that’s who. I am not that person.
Trina lives in Diamond Valley, north of Eureka, Nevada. Check out her newspaper at www.theeurekacountystar.com or say “Hi” to her at [email protected].
Really!
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