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Tuesday, June 18, 2024 at 7:59 PM

The Feral Housewife's Weekly Horoscopes

The Feral Housewife's Weekly Horoscopes

Capricorn- Deceember 22 - January 19 Travel is on the horizon and likely troubles with your preferred mode of transportation. If you find yourself revisiting the same place repeatedly, do not be surprised. You will be spending a lot of time in places that feel familiar, even if you have never been there before. When your mode of transportation has issues, you will know exactly how to fix the situation.

Aquarius- January 20 - February 19 You are leading a revolution! The revolution surrounds the family. You start digging deep into the past and happen to dig up things that might have been better left buried. As you try to push the boundaries of relationships, look for guidance in past lives. Beware, if you are going to push too far, you will be paying the price

Pisces-February 20 - March 20 Home is where the fish swim. You are in a loop of home improvement, and strangely every situation seems familiar to you, almost like you have seen this show before because you have. When you find yourself questioning a new living situation, and you feel like you know the ending before you’ve even hit play, it is because you do. Trust your gut. You have lived this before.

Aries- March 21 - April 10 Let go of all the feelings that you are holding onto like a life ring, suggesting you have failed. Take a moment to remember the success you have managed and take a deep look into what you are. These self-perceived failures are not any representation of you. Re-evaluate the entirety of yourself and start working with the pieces you forgot you have.

Taurus- April 21 - May 20 Leave the past where it belongs, in the past. Today you can learn from the lessons of what history has taught you and honor yourself by creating the karma you long to see. This is the time in your life to create the story that you want to be told about yourself later. Do not rely on others to write that story for you. You won’t like what

Gemini- May 21 - June 20 Success is yours for the taking. You have an entirely new place in this world that is waiting for you. Don’t rely on the idea you had for long-term happiness. You can achieve anything, and right now is the time to do it! Use your ideas surrounding success and your life’s mission to do some soul searching. Live the life you have always wanted. If you can dream it, you can achieve it.

Cancer- June 21 - July 22 It is time to rebrand! You have been living in a role that may have suited you, but this is the best moment to go forth and peel away at all the outer layers and really get to the core. Allow yourself to do some intense digging into what you actually want. Leave behind what you are doing because of your role with others.

Leo-July 22 - August 22 Change is growth. This is the time to stop carrying the emotional boulders of others in your circles. You are finally free to give the boulders back to their rightful owners and move forward without being responsible for the feelings of friends. Focus on your boulders this week and enjoy the friends that are not asking you to take responsibility for their emotions.

Virgo- August 23 - September 22 The façade that you have been living behind is about to be shed. The person you are with those who depend on you the most, like your children, can come to the forefront. You will start to shift from the parental figure in everyone’s life to the parental model to only those who need it. While you are adjusting to this, make sure you stay away from becoming completely self-absorbed!

Libra-September 23 - October 22 Déjà vu is in full force! You have the sense that you have been there before, and you probably have. This time around, you can go forward with what you had been longing for, for the first time. You are in a great place to reach your goals, as the good news is coming your way. Your desire to help others and be charitable does not mean that you must send yourself to the poor house doing it.

Scorpio- October 23 - November 22 Life experiences have readied you for what is happening. With an inheritance or asset you think is coming, there will be a sideswipe from your past life. All the debts and credits that you thought you had in the pocket to balance out the books will be coming at you hard and fast. The strangely familiar situation means you have been here before and will know how to address this.

Sagittarius- November 23 - December21 You find yourself in a situation that you have seen before. You are in a position where budgeting is the only plan, you may have overextended some credit, and it is time to pay it back. You had acquired the credit when things were good, and a change in circumstances has left you wondering how you will do it all. Don’t rely on past experiences this time.

Alicia Parsons grew up in Yerington and has been a dishwasher, teacher’s aide, patient care representative, and debt collector, before landing her current and favorite gig as a feral housewife to Trevor and card-carrying mother-of-the-year to three-and-a-half-year-old Rhett.